Definition of shyness:

adj. shi·er (shr) or shy·er, shi·est (shst) or shy·est

1. Easily startled; timid.

2.

a. Drawing back from contact or familiarity with others; retiring or reserved.

b. Marked by reserve or diffidence: a shy glance.

3. Distrustful; wary: shy of strangers.

4. Not having paid an amount due, as one’s ante in poker.

5. Short; lacking: Eleven is one shy of a dozen.

intr.v. shied (shd), shy·ing, shies (shz)

6. To move suddenly, as if startled; start.

7. To draw back, as from fear or caution; recoil.

n. pl. shies (shz)

So this is the dictionary definition of being shy, but what about the DATING definition of shyness. Its a bit simpler:

Shyness = No dating.

What we have learnt over time is that shyness will significantly impact on the number of dates you get. This should be fairly obvious to most of you, who would realize that the formula of More Tries = More Dates would mean that shy guys just don’t have the numbers, and its definitely true. The numbers just don’t work. Say there is a shy but above average looking guy. He stands in the corner. He has his arms folded and doesn’t approach anyone.  Even when other guys come up to him, he gives them 1 syllable answers and doesn’t engage in any activities or conversation.  Other guys will ALSO not talk to you. So this applies not only to your guy-girl interactions, but also with your friendships. So how can you beat this?  Here are the essential tips to help you on your way to overcoming shyness. Don’t be Love Shy! Be Love Confident!

Get rid of my shyness tips

1. Posture: Stand tall. Don’t slouch and droop your shoulders. Make sure that you have a strong core (ie stomach is held firm and chest is proud) – you don’t have to be a muscle man, but if you concentrate on these 2 things, you will appear very much more confident. Whilst you are at it, don’t just do it half arsed, actually stand in front of a mirror and check what you look like. Having a bad posture will make you look love shy.

2. Body language. Make sure that you aren’t giving signals that tell people to go away. Arm crossing, looking down at your shoes, turning away when someone is speaking to you, etc – all have an impact on whether people will talk to you. Remember, being shy does not only mean that you aren’t making the effort to speak to others, but also means that people won’t want to talk to you if you are not giving them the correct messages. By working on your body language, you will improve the number of people that come up and talk to you which in turn means More Tries = More Dates.

3. Eye contact. Although eye contact is in part to do with your posture and your body language as above, it is so important, it deserves its own bullet point. Eye contact with other girls AND other guys is an essential part of overcoming your shyness. Shy guys do not hold gazes. They look away as soon as they are looked at, and people perceive this as being shy/weak/not confident. Make the change. Scan the room with your eyes and hold gazes. But don’t stare. It IS a bit of a balance, but I’m sure you will get the right idea. A quick tip – when holding a gaze, especially with a female, in your mind just think: “You are reaaaaaaalllllly hot” and if you are still looking at them for any longer than that, then its too long. Don’t stare.

4. Be proactive. Overcoming shyness means you need to put yourself in some uncomfortable situations. Sure, you may not WANT to approach a group of girls – and yes, I do know that they may seem intimidating – but you will NEED to do this a few times to get it into your psyche that they will NOT bite you.  The trick is – start slow. Approach 2 girls – perhaps they aren’t too good looking. Have a chat, not longer than 2-3 minutes, and then move on.  Then approach 2 girls who are a bit better looking, and then next time approach 5 girls who are good looking.  And so on and so on.  Over time (A relatively short amount of time), this tip in itself can help you get past your shyness and move on.  Within a few weeks, you will be so much more confident, you will be amazed.

5. Be Curious. This tip will help you when you are talking to others. Its a great trick, and one that I tell everyone that I can. All you need to do is be curious. Or be interested. When are you next talking to someone and you are in the process of curing your shyness, all you need to do is to ask the other person all about themselves. Be interested in what they are doing, or what they have done. You’d be amazed at how much people love talking about themselves. This is fantastic as then you don’t even need to think about anything to talk about! Once you master this technique, you will never feel shy again when you meet new people.

6. Boost your numbers. The biggest point of this article is to boost your numbers, and the only way you’re going to do this is by asking more and more girls out. Beating shyness can all be seen by the number of people you ask out in one night. The trick to this (And this one you shouldn’t tell everyone about or it will be obvious).  With a few friends, have a scoreboard. Call it the Board of Success. Just ask a few friends to keep score of the number of girls you ask out in one night. This is an honor system and one that will rocket you to success. Make it a game. You get 1 point per person you ask out. 2 points if they give you their number, and 3 points if you get a kiss (even on the cheek).  Someone has to witness each event, or sight the number. By the end of the night, you will have a few numbers, have gotten a few kisses on the cheek, and at the end of the day – you’ve overcome shyness and stop being love shy!

Now go on, get out of here and make this work. I guarantee that if you follow these steps, you will get over your shyness before you know it. Be a love guru, not love shy!

Happy hunting

Harry Laurent

Discuss this on the forum at www.datingdragons.com/forums

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2. How To Flirt With Women – A Beginner’s Guide
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Take your prize, and your female prize to the dance floor, and the night is yours.

If you don’t know what I mean here about picking up girls at the casino, or you need more clarification, just visit the forum here to ask me how, or send me a comment on this page. I always look forward to hearing from you!

Happy hunting

Harry Laurent

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2. The Truth About Attracting Beautiful Women
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Rule number 1: Only use online dating sites that are reputable. Ollie S from Dating Dragons has written a review of 3 of the best dating sites for 2010. These sites have been personally used by all members of the Dating Dragons team, and we can vouch for their safety. Read his post here. Its not hard to start an online dating site so don’t get sucked into false promises. The dating sites that we review on Dating Dragons are only ones that we deem are safe, and cheap. Afterall, we don’t want to have to pay huge amounts of money just to meet new people!

Rule number 2: Start a new email address. When you are online dating, I wouldn’t use your normal home or work email address. This can lead to more problems, and its much harder to break free of it if that email address is widely distributed, and if you use it for other things. Additionally, if you use a separate email address, there is no chance that other people might stumble across it at work – which can be difficult to explain at times! Just go to Gmail or Yahoo or Hotmail and signup for a free email address there. Keep it JUST for your online dating sites, and make sure you don’t use the same password that you use on other things like your normal email.

Rule number 3: Watch out for red flags. We’ve already touched on red flags in online dating so you should be mindful of these things. A few important aspects of this are when meeting people who just seem to good to be true. Remember, often people online will not divulge everyting about themselves initially, but when they tell you that they love long walks on the beach, and look like Jessica Alba, you have to start wondering that maybe they are trying to pull the wool over your eyes. Don’t get caught out. Keep your guard up at all times. If you have a situation that you need some advice on, just let me know. I can give you some help there. Its happened to me!

Rule number 4: Never give out financial information or information that is overly personal. Remember what they ask you when you sign up for credit cards, and bank accounts: Your mothers maiden name, your first pets name, your first school, your favorite food etc. Its all things that can be used in identity theft.

Rule number 5: If someone tries to send you a file that doesn’t look like a picture file or something you know, then get rid of it. There are many other ways that people can show you their profile picture or additional photos. Such as facebook, or on their own website. If someone is trying to send you a file, make sure you know a little about antivirus software, and how to spot faked files. People who are trying to steal your identity can send you a file that actually loads a small trojan or keylogger on your computer and sends them information about your bank logins and personal details. Obviously, sometimes its totally innocent – all I am saying, is be careful.

If you follow these 5 basic rules, you should be safe. Overall, people can be safe doing most things online if they are sensible. Online dating is one of those things where identity theft is starting to really creep in because its so popular and easily accessible.

If you find that you need more help ascertaining whether or not you need help protecting your identity, I suggest you take a look at Identity Lookout. It has a free trial offer (Only for US users) which allows you to check out what they have to offer. We all use it here at Dating Dragons, as identity theft is one of those things you can’t ignore. Its like insurance against the most important thing in your life! YOU! Protect yourself against identity theft now.

Happy Hunting

Harry Laurent

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3. Online Dating Over Festive Season

1. Select your party carefully – During the festive season, you will receive many many offers to attend parties. There will be christmas parties for your work, your family bbq, your friends meetings for drinks, and more. Don’t go to everything thinking you will pick up. There are some functions which will have a much higher yield than usual. Most popular local bars will have a christmas night, or a new years eve party – these are HOT SPOTS for meeting girls. Don’t go to your parents bbq if you are planning on that special midnight kiss!

2. Call a few girls – if you know some nice single girls, or even have an online dating  account where you have a few girls that you speak to on there, invite them out. Its a numbers game – invite 3-5 girls to a party, and you can be sure that you will score by the end of the night. Remember not to invite them exclusively. Say something like: My friend is having a party at his house – if you’re not doing anything, come along! If you don’t present it like that, you may come across as a bit of a jerk when they realise that you’ve invited 5 of them just so you can score by the end of the night. Invite them to a party with lots of people that you know. Its also best if they don’t know too many people, so they keep trying to find you for the rest of the night.

3. 30 or so minutes before midnight, make sure that you have your target prepared. During the night, you should have made some kind of reference to her giving you a midnight kiss, to remove any feelings of tension or awkwardness when it comes to making your move at midnight.

4. Make the move. At midnight, don’t just stand there. Hold your girl close and just go for it. Girls are very receptive at this time of the night. AND they love confident men. If you falter, or pause, the moment will be gone. And remember, after the first kiss, the second and third ones are much easier!

So don’t delay. Get out there and start kissing!

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As a male, you would have thought to yourself, “Why does James Bond get all the hot women” or similarly, “How can I be like James Bond when it comes to attracting beautiful women”. Now although it is a fictitious show (Or is it!), we can learn quite a lot from the who idea and manner in which James Bond acts. So onto the juicy bits as to why he’s so successful, and we all had to go through all the phases of dating!

1. Confidence - now you’ve read many times about why I think confidence is important, and certainly, this has to be number one on the list. James Bond exudes confidence. He never backs down and he always knows what to do. You never see him thinking about asking a girl out. He always has a smart quip or response when put into any situation. Learn from this. Pre-think your actions, and how you want to be viewed before you are “assessed” by all the beautiful women out there.

2. Fashion – James Bond never dresses in his sisters hand me downs. Check out Casino Royale. He is dashing and attractive at all times. Sure, he has a nice body and people making him look handsome, but keep in mind that many guys just don’t look good because they are not dressed in the right clothes. The world of online fashion is amazing. You just need to google all the different fashion tips there are, and you will never be lost. Going to the beach? Don’t turn up in jeans! A nice pair of Havanas, and boardshorts with some matchin accessories, and you’re done. Not an accessories kind of guy? No matter…Just make sure you don’t stick out like a sore thumb!

3. James Bond never accepts defeat – How many times in the movies have you seen James Bond turned down by beautiful women. It happens all the time. In the end, he always gets his girl. The reason is, he never accepts defeat. Keep this in mind next time a girl says that she won’t give you her phone number. Don’t press her like a madman, you will get the chance to impress her again, and if not, just move on. Find another girl. That’s what James Bond does.

4. Never a 1 woman man – James bond never focusses only on 1 woman. In all his films, he always has more than 1 attractive girl going at any time. Often there is a bad girl and a good girl. In the end, do they care? Not in the least! Funnily, this is actually closer to the truth in real life than you think. Girls like men who have attractive women hanging around them, or guys who have the ability to pick up women. They don’t really want that goofy guy in the corner, who is waiting for some hot bird to come and pick him up. That will never happen! Never focus your attention on just one women, or she will feel either smothered, or like you’re desperate. Spread your efforts evenly…It will pay dividends in the future.

5. Be funny – James Bond is never bland. He always has something a little quirky to say. And listen to all the cringe worthy catch phrases and “dad” jokes that he makes. You may think – what a goof – but girls like these. And in any case, its always going to better than just saying, Oh yeah?… Always have a few fall back options for being funny. Even pay yourself out to be funny. In the end, the girl is laughing and you are the focus of the positive feelings. Mission accomplished.

6. Have physical prowess – James Bond is no slug. He doesn’t sit around like fat slob. He is always running, or jumping, or doing something physical, and he is always the best at it. Sure, there are times to be debonair, but most of the time, being good at physical things makes you more attractive. Think of why Handymen get married women, or why Jocks get the school prom queen – being good physically makes you more attractive. Guys, hit the gym! Pick a sport that you are actually good at and go for it. Be as good at that sport as you can. Don’t worry – you don’t need to be the best at it, you just need to beat the guys on your street!

So there you have it. Want to be like James Bond with the ladies? Want to attract those hotties like Octopussy? Just follow these steps and you will make it there! If you want to read more tips from the DatingDragons.com website, just be sure to sign up to our newsletter. All subscribers get a FREE ebook, which has PAGES of dating tips that you can take away with you! What does it cost you? Nothing! Just sign up, and you will receive your ebook in your email inbox soon!

Visit the Forum at www.datingdragons.com/forums

Once again, Happy Hunting

Harry Laurent

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2. How To Attract Beautiful Women
3. Pick Up With Essential Flirting Techniques

Timing: Getting your timing right in every part of dating a girl is never more important than when asking a girl out. Try not to ask a girl out when she is preoccupied or busy with something – you are seriously reducing your chances. Ask her when she is happy, and free. A good time would be when you’ve just told a good joke, or when you both have had a laugh at something. Studies show that a persons mind is far more receptive to suggestion when they have just had a laugh. Use this fact to your advantage.

Preparation: Some guys go to huge lengths to prepare for asking a girl out. Unforutunately this isn’t the best thing to do in the long term. Sure there may be a few couples out there with romantic stories of how they met, or how a girl was asked out – but I know that they are just one in a thousand. If you follow this thought, you will be so scared and pressured when asking a girl out, that she will think you are crazy! Don’t ask her out with sky writing or on the megascreen at the superbowl – save those for later!

What to say: So what should you say when asking a girl out on a date? Of course, as I link to in many of my other articles, being confident is the key. You do not need to have a silver tongue to ask a girl out on a date. Make sure that you don’t stutter, and that you can ask her out with confidence and that will make you 50% more successful for a start. Tell yourself that she is lucky to be asked out by someone like you. This will flow on to the way you ask her out.

Dealing with rejection: I’ve already touched on this in previous articles, but keep in mind that you will NEVER have a 100% record. You will never even have 50%. If you got a date 25% of the time you asked a girl out, you are already doing well. Keep that in mind for later down the track, as you can never let a rejection put you down. Some of the most successful guys are the ones that just keep trying and trying. And never back down to a different standard to what you’re looking for. ie: Just because you didn’t get the 9/10 stunner at the bar doesn’t mean you have to have 10 drinks and pick up the 3/10 she-male standing next to her at 5am in the morning. Keep you head up.

OK, so you’re probably wondering why I haven’t given you some lines or some ideas of how to pick up, but that’s the point. Asking a girl out on a date shouldn’t be about fancy lines and locations. Its all about your attitute, and mental preparation. A girl will say YES if you project to her that you are worth going out with.

If you have any questions, ask me on the forum at www.datingdragons.com/forums or comment to me here.

Happy Hunting

Harry Laurent

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3. How To Deal With Rejection

What is a Dating Red Flag? I’m sure you have already experienced those situations where something someone has said to you, or done in front of you has made you feel a bit weird. Or a bit uneasy. These are instinct cues. Some people think that only certain people have instincts. But everyone has the same instincts, the only difference is that some people know how to read, interpret and act on them. Read more and I will teach you how. Firstly let’s visit online dating. You would have started off relatively skeptical, as everyone does. You are not sure that online dating will be safe. Fair enough. Often these relationship meeting spots are rife with unsavoury characters. It is very wise to have a second email address or similar to deal with these situations. I often have an email address called the burn email. If it gets too hot for whatever reason, I shut it down. A good example is using gmail. You can even register multiple email address within the same login. Here are a few red flags of importance, not only for online dating, but also for regular dating as well.

Take heed, as these will serve you well in the future and may just prevent you from ending up writing in the dating disasters section of the forum board!

- Someone you just met online tries to get your phone number or address within the first week of meeting you

- You receive more than 3 messages a day

- The person you are talking to online or in the real world does not answer your questions directly. Why are they avoiding your questions?

- Puts pressure on you to meet them, or gives you an ultimatum

- Will not contact you by phone after you have developed your online relationship. Avoids any real (home phone number, address) information.

- Describes many cliche situations – ie: loving to sit next to a log fire, drinking hot chocolate and gazing into each others eyes.

- Strong religious or political views that you feel are being pressured on you.

OK, sure, this list could go on, and I’m sure they are things that you already know, so onto the interesting part. What about dating red flags to let you know that the person you are dating (online or offline) isn’t really who you think they are:

- Always arrives late, and in a hurry to leave all the time

- Only calls you at strange hours

- Looks at their phone during dates and then changes plans immediately

- Is always looking around the room, scanning the crowd whilst talking to you

- Seems to know lots of people but won’t introduce you.

Right well, as you can see, there are a lot of red flags to observe. And probably many many more that I haven’t written about. The most important dating red flags, however, and the ones that you may be mostly interested in, are those given by a woman, that indicates that she’s just not that into you!

- Girls love communication. So be worried if she always seems to be ending conversations (ie ending an email thread or facebook chat or sms barrage). In general, men will always want to end conversations far before women.

- She seems to know lots of men, and flirts with them, and never introduces you.

- The plans you try to make are often twarted at the last minute. You seem to be chasing her schedule all the time.

- When you are together, you feel that you need to impress her all the time just to get her to keep talking to you.

- She never offers to pay for anything.

- She never invites you to meet her friends.

I hope this list has given you some insight into the dating red flags that I have come across in my travels. There are many many more dating tips and cautions that I have, however my articles have been getting to long (So I’m told!). If you would like to ask me more, please ask me on the forum located at http://www.datingdragons.com/forums or facebook me – search for Harry Laurent!

Thanks for reading

Happy Hunting

Harry Laurent

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Beautiful women on the other hand, are approached by men numerous times. Like with anything that happens all the time, they get bored. Hot girls know they are hot- they have people telling them that all the time. To make their life easier they have little plans to avoid having to waste their time with every guy who comes up to them to tell them they are beautiful. They tell you they are attached, are really busy with work or aren’t allowing themselves to see anyone right now. Effectively they are telling you to ‘piss off’ in a nice way. So why do they do this? Well, most guys will do one of two things when they approach a beautiful woman. To hide their nervousness most men will: 1. Compliment her on her looks 2. Bribe her Let me describe these in a little more detail. 1. Compliments Most men will open up their conversation with a beautiful woman by telling her how hot she is. She already knows this so why waste your time to look like every other guy. Hot women know they are hot, so what they crave is appreciation of them as a person.

Why do they do this?

Well, 99% of guys are too scared/ nervous/ excited to approach a beautiful woman, so what do they do? Most of the time they just stare at her across the room, unconsciously drooling while fantasizing about her in their head. This makes her feel like a piece of meat and think all guys are superficial. So when she sees you staring then muster the guts to approach her and all you can do is tell her how beautiful she is you quickly get placed into the category of being just another guy who wants to get into her pants. Compliments do work with beautiful women, but there is a special art to the compliment. That is the topic for another article. 2. Bribery Attractive women make most men feel nervous and inadequate. So what do we do? We try to bribe them into talking to us. Typically a guy will see a beautiful girl, approach her, tell her how beautiful she is and then straight away ask her if he can buy her a drink. True, if she says ‘yes’ then this will buy you more time to prove yourself but the reality is that most women see it as bribery and will reject your offer. This is because if she allows you to buy her a drink, she feels she will owe you something in return, a problem she would rather not have to deal with. To attract and date beautiful women keep these thoughts in mind. Hot girls know they are hot and you need to have a strategy that will put you above the losers.

For more tips and advice on how to attract and date beautiful women visit the forum at www.DatingDragons.com/forums

Happy Hunting

Harry Laurent

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2. How To Attract Beautiful Women
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1. Keep things real – it is only a date. Your life does not depend on it, whatever you may be thinking. This puts you in a better frame of mind. Many guys are scared of dating, and this shows. Relax!

2. Take your time getting ready. Don’t rush – if that means going home slightly early – do it. You will be prepared, sharp and ready…Rushing will make you seem a mess to an attractive woman.

3. Choose your outfit early and do make an effort to look nice. Your confidence will show through in how you carry yourself. Unless you are Brad Pitt, most guys need some confidence boosters. A new pair of shoes will help!

4. Play some nice music that puts gets you in the mood and makes you feel good. A CD that makes you dance around is always good to make you relax and exude confidence and happiness!

5. Make sure you know where you are going and when you need to be there. Rocking up an hour late, or getting lost isn’t a good look…Book a cab with time to spare.

6. IMPORTANT: Quality Aftershaves ONLY! These supermarket 2 dollar Lynx sprays will not suffice – despite what the ads tell us. Whilst your own nostrils may not be able to detect the half a bottle of Hugo Boss you have just drenched yourself in, your date will not be able to see you though the vapor cloud.

7. Give some thought to what you are going to talk about and what things you would like to avoid. It isn’t quite an interview situation and should never feel like one, but some of the same rules apply. Preparation is the key.

8. Tell a good friend where you are going just in case you need to “call in a favour”.

9. Ensure your shoes are neat and that you have remembered the accessories such as nice belt, watch and wallet. The details may not be so important to you, but they speak volumes about you.

10. Try to eradicate any preconceptions or expectations. This date doesn’t have to work. It is just a night out with a member of the opposite sex. If things do work out then great, but as I said at the beginning, be cool. Your date will spot any tiny signs of desperation on your part before you even know it which is why before arriving on a date you should do everything to make yourself relax.

11. If you wish to take flowers along, that’s nice but keep the proportions small and make things subtle and stylish. Like I said in my previous article – showering a girl with gifts is a sure way to make it look like you’re compensating for something – be it your personality, or your confidence.

12. Do not imagine you are going to score this evening even though it may not be far from your mind. By the same token, do make sure that your bed sheets are fresh and the place is tidy, just in case. I’ve always liked the saying: Plan like you’re live forever, and live like you’ll die tomorrow.

13. Picture the person you think you are about to meet and what you have to say about yourself, particularly with reference to any questions they may ask you.

14. Even at this early stage remember that you will not be telling anyone that you love them this evening (See my previous article on revealing your feelings!).

15. Body language speaks more about you than you think. Think about your body signals in advance as well as remembering how to read theirs so that you can pick up all the standard interest signals. It tips the scales in your favour when you know what they are thinking.

Happy Hunting

Harry

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2. When To Call After The First Date
3. Do Bad Guys Always Get the Girl?

1. The cheapest prostitutes in the world are the Petrapole people, who live in Bangladesh. They charge as little as 10 rupees, which is about a quarter.

2. A pigs orgasm can last half an hour.

3. The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime-time TV was Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

4. During foreplay, a woman’s breasts can increase in size up to 25%.

5. According to the World Health Organization, 100 million acts of sexual intercourse occur each day

6. Ultrasounds have shown that the male fetus is capable of attaining an erection during the last trimester of pregnancy.

7. Mouse sperm is longer than elephant sperm.

8. The average speed of ejaculation is 45km/h.

9. Thirty percent of women over 80 years old will still have sex with their spouse or boyfriend

10. In America, 11,000 people will injury themselves every year while trying out bizarre sexual positions.

So enjoy! If you find anymore, let me know!

Visit the forum at www.datingdragons.com/forums

To read more crazy sex facts, click here.

OllieS

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