How To Be More Confident

I remember reading a survey in an unnamed, leading women’s magazine that stated the Number 1 most attractive quality in a man was their confidence. Not arrogance, mind you, confidence. It took me a while to think about this, and for this salient point to sink in as to what it really meant. Did it mean grabbing the girl in a standard moviestar pose and whisking her backwards whilst I kissed those luscious lips of hers whilst doing the tango? Did they mean turning on my best caveman impression and never taking no for an answer? Did it mean turning up at her door and whisking her off to Italy for the weekend, though we had hardly met? What did they really mean by confidence? The answer was there to find out.

If you ask a pool of women, they will all have different top 10 lists of reasons why they attracted to men, so this is not the answer for all situations – but the fact is, if we can train ourselves to be more to more women, then that’s half the battle won, isn’t it? Confidence, it appears, is in the eye of the beholder. Even more worse, confidence can easily be misconstrued as arrogance, so one has to tread fairly carefully. The important point is not confidence in itself, but is better defined by its opposite – fear. Fear in men is not an attractive feature. Fear defines a man as not knowing his own value, lacking a feeling of self worth, not being sure of his abilities, lacking in presence and determination. This I may add is very different from justifiable fear that we all face. The following tips will help you to make a great first impression.

After all, a woman is looking for someone who will not only match with her mentally and physically, but someone who can drive her further, someone who has enough ambition and vitality – someone who can pass his self assuredness on to her. A man who is confident is VERY SEXY because he is comfortable with himself, he is in total control and he is able to make decisions, good decisions. He is confident in the choices he makes and in choosing you. He passes a feeling of being special on to you. Being selected by the right man can be very sexy indeed to women.

If you are going to date the beautiful woman in the corner and father her children then running away is not a good start, neither is feeling sorry for yourself and failing to be able to hold a decent conversation. Far too many men decide before even approaching a women whether they are worthy of a woman’s attentions or not. Far too often men will believe that they are not. Except where alcohol or drugs are involved. Men in bars exude confidence, but they also exude beer breath as well! No the fact is that guys who lack confidence prejudge most situations and inevitably take themselves out of the dating fray before it ever happens, hoping, strangely, that the woman will make the first move.

The thing is, the confident men more often than not get the hot girl, because the confident man has that something about him. I know many attractive men, that just cannot approach women and therefore, aren’t successful – and at the same token, many average men who have women throwing themselves at them – so it’s not necessarily about looks. No, it’s about something deep within. Confidence is about self respect and self understanding. It comes from understanding what you yourself are about and when this happens a “sexy man” reaches out. Often lack of confidence in men is because of physique and yet it is an issue so easy to fix. 8 weeks in a gym will change a man’s life. A fit man is a confident man. Dress is also something that instills confidence – stay tuned for some of my fashion tips for dates and for getting the attention of attractive women. No man has an excuse for not dressing reasonably smart these days as fashion for men is everywhere.

Ultimately we all lose confidence sometimes – its only natural. People can take our confidence away at work or at home, in our relationships, and on our own. Ultimately though these are transient phases.  If a man can do a single thing for himself in the dating game, that will be to learn about his own confidence levels in an honest way and then go about doing something to improve them. Feel good about yourself lads, and someone will feel good about you.